I’m sorry but it needs to be said. Some of us in the Natural haired community are driving a wedge between the whole lot with this constant quest to define, find, or make some damn curls in their hair! There’s no other way to describe this other than chasing the curl dragon. It is so unnecessary and a little disheartening…
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I understand. You are a newly Natural or thinking about going Natural. You want or expect your hair to look a certain way. You want an instant halo of cascading curls that will make you feel better about yourself for taking such a drastic step with your hair. Having curls will shut your family, friends, and/or significant other up about going Natural. You can then shout in their faces that you have curly hair and NOT nappy hair.
Now don’t get me wrong. Some of us have curly hair or coily hair. We get admirers saying all the time that they would go Natural if their hair would do that but why the hell is that even a point to be made? Why does it have to curl for you to embrace it? Here are a few pointers to remember:
No, there are no products that will make your hair curl.
No, the curly girl method will not make your hair curl.
Yes, you can do twist out and braid outs to get a wave or a curly pattern.
Yes, you will still be beautiful without curly hair.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news but it needs to be said that not everyone has curly or coily hair. If that’s the ONLY reason you went Natural you will be sorely disappointed. There is too much emphasis on this and we gotta stop it. Loving what is growing out of your head is the object here as well as getting away from chemicals. Our hair is so versatile so just try the thousands of styles that YouTube is full of. You would be surprised.
See also: 4 Unusual But Effective Detangling Hacks For Wash Day
So don’t be mad at me for stating the obvious but once you come to terms with yourself and your hair you will be a happier Natural.
Loving all of you Naturals,
Sabrina
So true! Thanks for restating this. There is a You Tuber with 4C hair that just did a whol4 40 day no manitulation styling. She totally embraces the "no curl" and she is not stressed about it. I find her 40 very positive and is something many can look at and grow from. I wear my in many states curly. twist out and now more afro look. You would be amazed at the amount of compliments that my no product fro has gotten. So to the ladies afraid to wear "nappy" natural hair… hold your head up. It is your personal crown. Wear it proudly.
Absolutely. It's tiring seeing so many women trying to fight their own texture instead of embracing it and working with it. Nurture your tresses and they will grow. Thanks for sharing.
Great posting! The point you are making cannot be stressed enough. Obsessing over curl definition is the same as obsessing over bone-straight relaxed hair. It is still being dissatisfied with your natural texture if your natural texture isn't "curly". There's nothing wrong with exploring the options of what your hair can do, but there's also nothing wrong with a wild and crazy afro.
I agree 1000%! Its the same problem. Thanks for commenting.
i would love to see that video! can you share a link or title?
I hear so many post about how long it takes them to style their hair. Not me, 5-10 minutes and I am done, because I am not in search of the perfect curl definition
Smart way to go and less frustration.
"Yes, you can do twist out and braid outs to get a wave or a curly pattern."
Um, so what's the problem then?! Juuust playin'!
My mom gave me 4 Naturals Afro stretch curl cream. That mess made curls and coils like a boss by just running it through and I have strong nappy 4B/C good hair. So that constitutes as one product that giveth curls? My hair only resembles the lovely girl in the picture above (on the right) if I blow dry it. Which isn't "truly natural" either (and there is no point in blasting on the heat).
Final summation: Yes, you will still be beautiful without curly hair.
Maybe I'm coming off as a bit snarky
Hi Sabrina,
I really do enjoy reading your posts and normally agree on most things you write about but this time I beg to differ.
We all have curly / coily hair period. Thats a fact! The reason we can't see our curls sometimes is because our hair is so dehydrated and because we have used combs and brushes to ruin the curl pattern.
There are four types of hair – straight, wavy, curly, coily there is no such type as nappy! I have been doing the MHM regime for myself and a few friends and every single head that I have done has curls / coils. Some may have looked nappy to begin with but from the moment I applied the treatment their curls emerged.
I dont think there is anything wrong in wanting defined curls as this means your hair is hydrated and you will find it easier and quicker to style as you will have less tangles, ssks, breakage etc. Since Ive stopped using unsuitable products / heat/ combs, my curls are popping! Have a look at my blog and see for yourself… dubaidee4c.blogspot.com
Thanks for sharing and will check out your blog.
Correction: Everyone with Afro textured hair has curls/coils, it is the degree of visibility or the degree of clumping that makes a difference. 4c hair is the curliest/most coily with 2a hair being the least.