What is beautiful to you? What is beautiful to the young Black woman walking beside me on the sidewalk stealing looks at my hair? What is beautiful to the little black girl across the street with hair in a million braids and stands with eyes closed and head tilted upward facing the sun? What is beautiful to my man? Your man? Your woman? It ain’t always gonna be the same.
See also: Do I Need You to Like My Natural Hair?
There was a discussion in one of Curly Nikki forums on what Method Man said about ‘Peasy Afros‘ and hair being ‘done’. Yea, I was offended but I was truly the minority in that thread. Women were expressing how they could care less what he thought as well as agreeing that they didn’t like undone hair, peasy Afros either. There were a few who went so far to say that the Naturals who were offended get offended at every little thing and were insecure with their hair. We were told that not everyone was going to like our hair and was entitled to an opinion. I was a little taken aback.
Now, don’t get me wrong…..Method Man or anybody is entitled to their opinion. My main problem was voicing negative comments against Black women. We get so much bad press! It’s a little upsetting to me when a black man voices his dislike about something on a black woman to the masses. Sorry, but I’m entitled to THAT opinion too.
As I continued to read the rants by the Naturals disliking bad hair styles or unkempt hair I realized what truly upset me. What I think is done or beautiful would be ugly or undone to others. I love the pics above. Every style to me is perfect. To some reading this post or some who wrote in that Curly Nikki thread may not agree but does that really matter? Why does my fro have to be even? Why do my curls have to be the same size and definition? Can’t they just ‘BE’???
I love wild, crazy, uneven, out of shape hair. To Method Man and to many my hair would look a hot mess but to me it is how I feel and want to present to the world. One cannot assume I didn’t put actual thought into my style. I know there are others out there who think like me. Why must we conform to a some unknown standard when being Natural? Is there a standard and just some of us aren’t in on it? I really don’t have a clue.
My point is I wanna be me and I want my hair to be free. If you find my hair a mess then please don’t judge me as I won’t judge your proportioned shaped, same dimension curls, coils or kinks. Natural should be whatever you want it to be as far as style, color or shape. Well, I guess that’s just MY definition of being Natural since I’m sure some won’t or don’t agree. Can we just agree on me being me and you being you? I think that’s how it should be.
Loving me for me Naturals,
Post from 2011