Quote of the Day: Little Black Girls & The Divine Tube of Relaxer

Ain't this sad?  Had to share and give my 2 cents.  Yea, I agree with the quote.  Going Natural is just that...NATURAL.  Our hair is beautiful no matter what the texture is!  No such thing as bad hair.  (except what is on my head today becuase I'm in dire need of a wash!  It's gross!)

What do you think??



Quote of the Day: Little Black Girls & The Divine Tube of Relaxer

Natural hair headaches!!

Aw, come on!  We know they exist.  Hair is hair and whether it's Natural or Relaxed, you are gonna have some issues that arise from time to time.  Being Natural doesn't mean you wake up in the morning with it done for you.  It still takes work and has to be done correctly.  I've listed a few issues or 'headaches' that will or can arise when dealing with Natural Hair.  The first four are for newly naturals.

1.   How do I start?/ What do I do?
This is inevitable.  If you have NEVER dealt with your Natural hair, then of course you are going to be clueless!  You will not have some intuition that kicks in and tells you what to do.  Research on the web, going to a Natural Hair Salon, or talking to other Naturals will be necessary to get started on your new journey.  It can't be helped.

2.   Dealing with the transition period.
If you choose to keep your length and not BC you will have to work with two different textures of hair and figure out how to deal with it.  You may try a protective style like braids, weaves or wigs, but whatever you decide it can get aggravating.  You know how I know?  You can't read a hair blog, or website without seeing about five women getting sick of the transitioning and doing the BC even though they originally didn't want to.  It's hard, but don't fret...you are not alone.

3.   Buying new products.
You probably have a bathroom or closet full of hair products but all of them are for relaxed hair.  Believe me, there is a difference!  I made the mistake of keeping the old tried and true when I was relaxed and putting it on Natural hair.  It doesn't work!  Most of those products are made for chemically treated hair.  A lot of them say they can be used on both but I find that hard to believe since my Natural hair and relaxed hair were two totally different animals. 

4.   You may not like what you get.
A new Natural probably has an idea of what their Natural hair will look like.  It may be unrealistic or just plain wrong.  I've had several women considering going Natural because of the way MY hair looks.  I try and tell them that my own hair didn't look this way when I first started out.  Hair changes.  It could be hormonal, it could be the hair needs to get used to a different way of being treated.  Whatever the reason, newly natural hair can become very different in a few weeks, months or years. 

5.   Hair products may be expensive.
This one truly depends on the individual.  I have seen many Naturals complaining about the high price of Miss Jessie's products as well as Kinky Curly.  You can try cheaper products but they just might not work for you.  The list of products for Natural hair is growing but let's face it......there aren't as many as relaxed products.  You may have to just dish out the extra cash to get what works for your hair.

6.   Your hair will be wet a lot!
Natural hair needs and loves water.  It's essential and unless you consistently keep your hair in a protective style, you will be co-washing regularly.  I co-wash about five or six mornings a week and I know I'm not the only one.  Even if you don't co-wash regularly, you will be using some sort of moisturizer on your hair.  Oils, gels, whatever it is, it will be something necessary to keep your tresses moisturized. 

7.   Detangling
This can be a MOTHER of a problem!  It's a huge issue for quite a few Naturals and some struggle through it while others may just quit the Natural hair journey all together over it.  This is where the use of water  is necessary.  I slather a lot of conditioner on my hair during co-washing and finger comb so I don't get tangles.  Just putting  the detangling session off doesn't help and only makes it worse when you finally decide to get those tangles out.

Despite these headaches (and a few more dependent upon who you ask) I find them to be minimal and worth it.  This isn't for everybody but I believe most Naturals would agree that being Natural is worth all the headaches in the world.

Stay informed Naturals,
Sabrina

Seriously Sunday

This Sunday is truly about me getting my self together.  This past month has been a whirlwind of blogging and taking care of the family and work....exactly in that order!  I have my supportive husband taking up the slack until I got the swing of doing it all.  It's been rough but exciting all at the same time.

This blog has been therapeutic as much as it's been informative to me and others.  The Natural world is full of young women coming into the scene so self-assured and ready but there are so many older women peeking in and wanting to give it a try.  I wanna be able to help them along.  I want them to learn from my many, many mistakes and not have to fall flat on their faces by doing this all wrong. 

I've learned from some wonderful younger Naturals the basics of what to do and how to do it but when a woman is older...there are other issues that arise when doing something so drastic.  I just wanna jot down what I've been through and hear what others have been through too.  Maybe we can help each other find our center while changing ourselves for the world to see.  

Thank you all for hanging in there with me.  Please let me know how you feel and what you want this blog to be about.  That is the main reason it's here.  Thank you,

Sabrina P.

(untraditional) ODE to Merlot...



(ORIGIN)



This is to my older Natural sisters.  You know exactly what I'm talking about and going through.  Younger Naturals are still shaking they asses in the club slurping down the latest and greatest mixed drinks or taking shot after shot as they dance the night away.  Food never comes into play nor does sleep.  Yea, this post is not for you!

This post is to the older Natural who has thrown up their last bad night experience, walked out of the last club at 5 am in the morning or woke up to the last morning with their wig on backwards and make up smeared on the pillowcase.  We are soooo past that now.  We have embarrassed ourselves for the last time years ago and have learned our bodies cannot tolerate that foolishness anymore.  We are grown women now who no longer abuse the high priced watered down drinks of the club or the cheap wine with screw tops. We now abuse real bottled wine purchases at liquor stores or fancy wine establishments.  

It's a natural progression for most of us.  We're completely settled into our new routines as we wake up at 4 or 5 am getting ourselves as well as the rest of the family awake and ready for school or work.  We may just be getting up at 6 am to walk the dog or getting ourselves ready for our own work or school.  Either way we get up and start our day at hours younger Naturals wouldn't be caught dead getting up or may have just been stumbling home.  Our days are filled with customers, or co-workers and bosses with annoying ass traits and annoying ass issues that consume us for 7 to 10 hours a day.  We're trapped in that working world as we need this income to pay for that house or apartment that our kids or animals are trying to tear down daily.  After work we pick up our kids or dogs from daycare or school, bring them home and threaten them into doing homework, throw into the tub scrubbing the day's worth of dirt off before gingerly (yea, right) putting them to bed. 



(ORIGIN)



Then it's our time. Wine time. Snack time. Wrapping our minds around our long day and forcing it out by assisted drowning with one, maybe two, or even three glasses from our favorite bottle of wine.  It's our time or couple time or just lying in the tub having a relaxing bath time to enjoy the calm and quiet of another day's end.  The glasses allow us to sleep and removes the crazy thoughts of the day. 

This ode to Merlot, (or whatever is the wine of our choice) is merely a look into a world well known and loved by the older Natural.  Younger Natural....if you hung around to listen...thanks for not running away screaming.  You'll be here soon enough.

Vacation Fridays!!!



(ORIGIN)

Isn't it beautiful?  Yea, I think so too.  I am soooo overdue for a vacation, but like most people these days the money is just not there.  I kinda need a vacation after my last two posts.  Black people just can't catch a damn break, can we?  Nonetheless, I'm gonna enjoy just thinking about what I would be doing if I was in Cabo San Lucas right now.  (channelling Whitley Gilbert)  RELAX, RELATE, RELEASE!!

Enjoy your Friday!

Gene protects U.S. blacks from heart disease: study

(ORIGIN)

It's good to see this is being published but when reading more into the article it clearly states that these kinds of studies are NOT being conducted on Blacks very often.  How sad.  If that's not enough to make you angry look at this:

 African-Americans are less likely than whites to be prescribed heart drugs or receive bypass surgery, although blacks have an overall greater risk of heart disease than whites. source:  REUTERS

And we're supposed to believe racism doesn't exist...

 

Gene protects U.S. blacks from heart disease: study

(Reuters) - Some black Americans have a gene that protects them from heart disease, researchers said on Thursday.
About a quarter of African-Americans carry the protective gene, and if they are lucky enough to have two copies, one from each parent, their risk of heart disease is 10 times lower that of other blacks.

rest of article:  REUTERS

Where’s the diversity at the Oscars?

No surprise here!  Don't think I didn't notice they had Monique to assist in naming the Nominations.  I guess they thought we should be happy with that!



Where’s the diversity at the Oscars?
Here we go again. The Oscars lacked diversity in its nominations. According to CNN, ‘this year there was a decided dearth of diversity in the Oscar nominations. There are no women or people of color among the director nominees, and the acting nominees are all white. Javier Bardem, who is up for best actor for his role in “Biutiful,’ is a Spaniard and therefore European.’

Source:  madamenoire

(ORIGIN)

I've always felt the BMI or Body Mass Index was not accurate for Black women.  We are not built like white women nor do the majority of us want to be.  Studies, in the past, have claimed there was a higher percentage of Black women being overweight than White women.  Within recent years some light (although not nearly enough) has been shed on this accepted belief.  This study, reported in the Journel Obesity shows the incorrectness of the standard BMI and Black women.  I'm extremely happy to see studies are showing what most of us have known all along.  We are not supposed to be that skinny and/or without our curves!

This accepted belief of Black women being more overweight and having to conform to the standard BMI to calcuate what weight we should be has always been a bitter pill for me to swallow.  I will be sharing  pertinent articles and studies on Women of color and our own BMI. 

"Healthy" waist may be a bit bigger for black women

By Amy Norton

NEW YORK | Tue Jan 25, 2011 3:06pm EST

NEW YORK (Reuters Health) - The definition of a 'healthy' waistline may have a bit more wiggle room for African-American women than for white women, a new study suggests.

Read more at REUTERS HEALTH

straightening hair.....NOT an advocate



(ORIGIN)

I understand there are a lot of Naturals out there who find nothing wrong with straight hair.  Hot comb, flat iron....they are friendly tools to some of the fine women in the Natural hair community. 


I am not one of them....

Who do you look to (for Natural hair support?)



(ORIGIN)

The decision to leave your well-known way of taking care of your hair is harder than some may actually realize.  It may be harder than anything you've ever done before.  What can make this transformation not only harder but failure ridden is a lack of support. 


Five and a half years ago I decided to stop relaxing my hair and go Natural when we moved from New Orleans to Denver.  I felt the change in climate would be damaging to my hair.  Back then, my idea of being Natural simply meant no chemicals.  I didn't do any research or go to a salon for advice.  I just wore braids, wigs and weaves while using relaxed hair products on my hair.  For three years it never dawned on me I may be using improper products as well as improper methods on taking care of my tresses. 

My hair was damaged and without any knowledge I was actually doing a BC, I clipped the remaining relaxed ends as well as a TON of damaged hair.  I grabbed some hair care products off Target's shelves that I thought would assist me (they didn't) and began a REAL Natural hair journey.

I was nervous.  I was worried.  I applied those poor choices of hair products to my hair while trying to squash the insecurity in the pit of my stomach.  I wrapped one of my scarves around my head like a headband and went to work not knowing what to expect from co-workers who were used to my wigs and braids.   I walked into work and was welcomed with oohs and ahhs.  It sounded like the sweetest music I've ever heard and I've never looked back.

I did so many things wrong during those first few months.  I had no one to talk to since I didn't know anybody going Natural.  After I soon realized many products at an arm's grasp weren't for me; I was on the computer searching for ANYTHING and stumbled across Miss Jessie's products.  There my true journey began. 

I'm sure if I had someone to discuss my fears with as well as gain advice on what the hell to actually do with my hair this would have been a much smoother path to go down.  I don't regret going what I went through since it got me to where I am and I appreciate what I now know.  I can also assist others who may not know exactly what to do or just need support.  Some Naturals are surrounded by Relaxed family members or friends who are just unwilling to help or may even hinder your progress.  You may feel all alone.
I'm here to say you are not alone. There is a huge Natural hair community now just ready to help others who are interested in taking the plunge.  I'm sure it's even harder for older Naturals (such as myself) since it's a lot cooler to experiment with your hair and style during your college years and during your 20's.  Coming out of your comfort zone in your late 30's,  40's and even 50's can be one of the scariest things you may encounter.  Despite that fear, it can be done.  I'm here and planning to stay.  I truly couldn't be happier.

NO DUMPING PLEASE!! Not hating on relaxed women



(ORIGIN)

 I'm sure it seems that Naturals are haters of Relaxed women.  It probably looks like we think we're more 'real' than them or 'truly' black or even accusing Relaxed women of being self-haters.  Whatever some Relaxed women feel Naturals think of them doesn't compare to what they THINK we think of them.

Confused? Yea, you should be.  Why there is even a division on this is beyond me, but for whatever reason black people have had divisions on hair textures, skin color, speech, and geography just to name a few.  Our turbulent history has been filled with THIS vs. THAT,  but that's another post for another time and right now I'm here just to discuss the division of Naturals vs. Relaxed (Permies).

First of all....let's get the extremists out of the way.  You are gonna have some Naturals who feel like Permies are self-hating fake-ass white women wannabes as well as some Permies who feel like Naturals are tree hugging, bone-in-the-nose bush bitches.  I'm not here to discuss them.  I want to delve into the issue with the majority of the two. 

Whether I like it or not the division exists.  There are more and more women going 'Natural' and others are starting to notice.  You see more Natural hairstyles in advertisements, commercials, the runway...it's catching on.  I guess if you are a hard-core Permie you may feel a little threatened.  It's not personal.  Most Naturals are THRILLED to be represented more in the media and it may seem like a revolution you want no part of, but understand this is about self-love. 

THE WORLD DOESN'T REVOLVE AROUND YOU

I tell my children that all the time to get them ready for this cruel world we live in.  I say it now for Permies to understand we've got our own issues and it really has nothing to do with you.  This is a personal journey that each Natural has decided to partake in and most of us don't care how you choose to wear your tresses.  It's about us....not you.  When you sit back and take that in....you may no longer feel judged.  Just as you don't want to be judged by us and our perception of beauty, we don't want your judgement and perceptions of beauty bestowed upon us either.  I cannot tell you how many times a Natural has had a Permie's negative opinion of her hair verbally thrown upon her.   We get it from family members, significant others, co-workers...hell, even strangers in the street!  

I said all this to make the point that we ain't hating on you.  Yea, we'd love if you would come and join us, but this lovely journey may not be for you.  You keep on perming and I'll keep on co-washing.  As we pass each other on the street my smile will be genuine and I only want the same from you.  This can be a cruel world for the both of us and we both have to deal with it.  Let's just deal with it with one less division.



How to Grow Long African American Hair

I can't agree with a couple of the points regarding Relaxed hair in this article from madamenoire.com since I feel relaxing is too damaging for Black women's tresses.  Despite that, I find this piece rather informative and beneficial. 

How to Grow Long African American Hair

January 13th, 2011 - By Veronica Wells

Earlier this month in my Biggest Myths about African American Hair piece I mentioned that African American hair has the ability to grow as long as other races or ethnicities. Several disagreed, some rather rudely. (Never underestimate the fervor, passion or vigor black women have about their hair!) Either way I still stand by the statement.  You don’t have to be of multiracial origin to achieve the hair so many of us covet.  Honestly, you’d be hard pressed to find many African Americans who don’t have a little or a lotta bit of “something else” in their blood.

But that’s beside the point, African American hair can grow if properly maintained and that’s the key. The natural, coily texture of our hair is fragile and frankly many of us are very ignorant about what it takes for it to thrive. (Hence the YouTube tutorials.) So if you’re interested in tresses that graze the top of your booty, here are some tips to grow long, luscious African American hair.

You can continue reading this article at:  MadameNoire

Silk Wrapping Natural Hair...what the heck is that??

Technique Tuesdays - A look into some old and new technqies used on Natural Hair

Silk wrapping your hair is a relatively new technique of wrapping your hair while dry with a bit of moisturizer and shine spray and sitting under a hooded dryer. The purpose of this treatment is to give relaxed hair the ‘flat ironed and silky’ look without the heat trauma involved. For natural hair that has been pressed, the treatment will serve the same purpose with the added benefit of reducing the volume of the hair for a ‘flatter’ look. (ORIGIN)

I'm not so concerned about the Relaxing technique or the results but if a Natural wants some lenght in time of keeping the hair straight it might be a good thing to try. 

Start on dry hair. If relaxed, you should have roller set first or if natural, follow you usual process of straightening your hair.
• Take a dime sized amount of your moisturizer (preferably something light) and rub your hands. Apply to your hair concentrating on the ends and use a comb to smooth through your strands.
• Brush your hair into a smooth wrap trying not to use any pins as they will create creases in the finished look. If desired, spray your hair lightly with an oil sheen spray.
• Apply the saran wrap (cling film) over the hair quite firmly ensuring you cover the top of your head as well.
• Sit under a moderate to hot dryer for 10-20 minutes
• Remove the saran wrap and comb out the wrap.
• Silky smooth locks are yours!
If done correctly natural hair will not revert with the silk wrap treatment but instead the hair will be smoother. (ORIGIN)

(ORIGIN)

I'm all for homemade techniques and I truly believe this constitutes as one but I'm not one for flat ironing and wearing my hair straight.  i actually appreciate and love my hair shrinkage.  It appears to be the same as wrapping your hair in a silk scarf and that's what we've (myself, sister and daughter) usually do. 

Are they SERIOUS?!?!

This is too much to take.  I've heard the rumors and I've tried to find pertinent information regarding this new 'product' to gain a better understand of just what the heck it actually is.  All I'm hearing about is Bria Murphy as the Ambassador for it, but I wanna know how this new relaxer formulation is going to do what it CLAIMS??? 

SoftSheen-Carson® Announces Bria Murphy, Actress/Model, as New Global Ambassador for Dark and Lovely®

(ORIGIN)

PR Newswire has the full announcement and the most information I could find on it. 

"(Bria Murphy)...will be the face of Dark and Lovely's latest product innovation, Dark and Lovely® Healthy-Gloss 5™ System, the first-ever relaxer and maintenance system to preserve and restore all five signs of healthy hair with moisture, shine, strength, softness and body."  (ORIGIN)

I guess we'll just have to wait and see but it appears that the Relaxing Giants are feeling the pressure from the Natural Community and it's growing number of Black women cutting those chemicals (their livelihoods) out of our heads.  They needed to find something to attract us back.  All I can say about it right now is... don't fall for the hype.

sniff, sniff...eww! What's that smell??

OK...I've given myself a flipping HEADACHE by doing something out of my norm.  As I walked into my building from the parking garage this morning (as I do every morning from M-F) I kept smelling something oily or greasy.  I couldn't put my finger on it but figured it was something in the air.  I got in the building....still smelled something....walked around for a few....still smelled something.....sat my butt down and STILL smelled something.

Oh, damn...it's that oil in my hair!!

My sister wanted me to try this oil she LOVES and went out and bought it for me because I wasn't moving fast enough to get it myself.  I've heard of the brand before (Africa's Best Ultimate Herbal Oil) and when I looked at the ingredients I was kinda impressed:

Soy Bean Oil
Walnut See Oil
Kiwi Fruit Extract
Olive Fruit Oil
Castor Seed Oil
Sesame Seed Oil
Jojoba Seed Oil
Carrot Seed Oil

I saw it could be used on hair AND body and that was a serious plus for me.  I thought I had an alternative to my Coconut oil which is my staple favorite.  Well, I apply body oil (sometimes my coconut oil) on my body after I shower or bathe so I tried this oil instead over the weekend.  I liked it.  I applied it as a sealant on my hair replacing my coconut oil over the weekend also.  It worked well.  I was impressed!  Well, this morning I applied it to my hair as a sealant and kept it moving as I got ready to go to work. 

Well, like I said earlier, it took me to sit down at my desk before I realized it was the oil in my hair that smelled and has my stomach queasy right now.  I cannot stand it!  Maybe it was the build from the three days just overpowered my senses.  Maybe I applied too much.  Maybe I'm just now smelling it, but whatever the reason I'm not using that stuff again!  I hate the smell of oil and i don't wanna be walking around smelling like a skillet on high with oil in it!  How embarrassing!

My coconut oil smells heavenly and it's a light scent.  I've been faithfully using it as a sealant for over a year with NO COMPLAINTS.  You see, I'm a true creature of habit.  If something works for me....I continue to use it.  Why mess with perfection?  I know there are product junkies out there but I am not one of them.  Now, don't get me wrong....I have WAY too many hair and beauty products in my bathroom but I'm not one to try the latest and the greatest.  If you looking for Product reviews I'm gonna have to have guest bloggers for that. When I find somethng that works for Sabrina...I'm true to it!

Smelling bad is a serious no no to me and I won't be using that oil again.

Biggest Myths about African American Hair

Found this article on one of my new favorites sites!  I really agreed with all their points and find it to be a great sourse of information. 

In our quest to outwardly express our inner diva, black women worldwide have sacrificed time and treasure to achieve ravishing ringlets, roller sets and relaxers. It’s a constant struggle and sometimes we’re unknowingly battling ourselves. There is a wealth of misinformation swirling about when it comes to African-American hair care. Acting on this false information only leads to unnecessary stress and frustration. Here are some commonly held misconceptions about African-American hair.

You can read the rest of the article at: 
Madame Noire

Seriously (quiet) Sunday



(ORIGIN)


This is what quiet means to me.  Right now my house is just as still as the water in this picture.  Both kids are still sleeping, I'm on the laptop and hubby is on the PC.  We're both taking advantage of the slumbering children.

I should be cleaning (something) but I'm being a little selfish this Sunday.  It's kinda nice just being adults sometimes.  Most of time we're parents, spouses, or employees.  So much time is consumed with others but for a few hours we're just people taking some time for ourselves. 

We have the rest of the day to interact with one another and the kids in our usual comfortable Sunday routine.  Until then I'll respect his space as he respects mine and blog, surf the net and drink my coffee.  I kinda think this is what regular people do all the time!  It's nice but so is my chaos.  We just need to find time for both.

Natural Innocence

Just too adorable.  Had  to share.



(ORIGIN)



I'm a guest blogger!!!

Check it out on Sassy Naturals!!!

Sassy Naturals: Guest Blogger: To Old To Be Natural?: "Source Guest Blogger Sabrina writes: OK, I turned 40 last year and it's only been five years I've been relaxer free but only two years I'v..."

Making those hair product dollars S T R E T C H

(ORIGIN)

We're living in dire times.  Our economy is in the toilet, we got a health care bill and then we don't, unemployment is staggering and people are losing their homes.  All of this and we STILL gotta do our hair? 

Yea, we do, but there are two ways to deal with this problem:

Buy cheaper products that don't work as well

OR

Be smarter with how you use your products

I'll be taking the second choice and I have a few tips that can allow you to do the same.  No, I'm no Suzy Ormon or Clark Howard.  I'm just a Natural who is fighting to make the same salary pay for higher food, higher utilities, and higher gas prices as well as a whole host of other bills that are steadily climbing. 

1.   Don't do your hair on off days. 

Pretty simple advice, huh?  I don't work on weekends so I do the two day hair or even three day hair instead of my usual wash and go.  I'll splash a little water and some oil to rejuvenate my curls and keep it moving.  Now, if I'm going someplace special I will spruce it up but most of the time my weekends are filled with grocery shopping and cleaning the house.  Why do my hair for that?  You are using less product and making your stash last longer. 

2.   Be Creative

Throw on a cute hat.  Wrap your hair in a beautiful scarf (we've all got them around the house) Just like the number above, you will use less product.  If you do that at least one day out of the week, you will see a real difference in how long your stash hangs around.  There are so many accessories in your hair junk drawer that you can finally use if you put on that creative thinking cap.   There are tons of Natural hair blogs showing you how to do it.

3.   Use what you already have.

If you are anything like me, you have product that you've tried that just didn't give you all you hoped.  Now, we're not talking about stuff that was a serious bad purchase.  I'm talking about almost as good but not quite.  It's sitting there so why not use it?  As long as you don't look like a complete fool you might as well use and it get that bottle out of the house. 

4.   Use less (heavy handed Naturals)

I am a heavy handed Natural.  I have to think about how much I am scooping out when applying my product.  If I don't I'll be using twice as much.  Give it a try.  You may find you really don't need as much as you apply. 

5.   Give a local product a try.

If you can only find your staple products online, you are most likely paying high prices for shipping!  You can always peruse the website to see if they have local retailers or you can do some research and find local stores carrying good alternatives.  Look....there are so many products out there for Natural hair now.   It's not ten years ago.  We are a strong market and retailers are looking to get our dollars.  Might as well benefit by not paying for shipping.

6.   Try homemade ingredients

I've saved so much money by cleansing my face with the Oil Cleansing Method (OCM).  Now I know this is for my face but the same premise applies.  There are so many talented Naturals who have found ingenious ways to make their own hair products.  You can find them sharing their concoctions on Natural hair blogs and forums. 

These are just a few ways make your hair dollars stretch.  You won't end up with a million dollars but you will end up with long term strategies that will aid in getting through tough financial times while STILL looking Naturally Gorgeous!

Stay beautiful Naturals,
Sabrina

Vacation Fridays!!!




(ORIGIN)

 I can't speak for anyone else but this week has been challenging and long.  I had my daughter thinking she broke her foot as well as my son not bringing home his weekly spelling words.  Work was....WORK, which just means  DRAINING since I spend nine hours a day there. 

I really NEED to be out there listening to the waves crashing against the beach, smelling and almost tasting the salty air as I lie with my eyes closed enjoying my massage.

So serene, so soothing, so rejuvenating to the soul.  That's where I need to be. 

Where do you NEED to be?

I'm looking for some submissions!!!!



Got something you wanna say?  Check out my Contact page and pick a category to submit what's on your mind.  I'm looking forward to hearing from you!
Sabrina

BRAZILLIAN BLOWOUT: Revolutionary or just plain dangerous?

(ORIGIN)

I'm sure all the Naturals out there know about relaxers but have you heard about this Brazilian Blowout?  Only recently have I heard there was a buzz swirling around about this so I felt it was a good idea to discuss it.


I get the belief that some Naturals hold regarding ANY discussions on chemical altering techniques or procedures as taboo, but to me...Hair Education is just that.....Hair Education.  How can you make informed decisions on what to do with your hair if you don't know anything?


“The BRAZILIAN BLOWOUT is the most innovative and effective professional smoothing treatment in the WORLD! Through the use of a Brazilian Super Nutrient Complex and a proprietary polymer system, the Brazilian Blowout actually improves the condition of the hair by creating a protective protein layer around the hair shaft to eliminate frizz and smooth the cuticle. The end result is smooth, healthy, frizz-free hair with radiant shine! What makes us different? The ONLY Professional Smoothing Treatment that improves the health of the hair. No Damage! Entire treatment completed in just 90 minutes! No down time! The minute you leave the salon, you can wash and air dry your hair, and it will be smooth, frizz-free and radiant! Results last up to 12 weeks. Leaves hair smooth and frizz-free WITHOUT harsh chemicals. Acai aftercare products ensure longest lasting results.” (ORIGIN)


CONTAINS NO FORMALDEHYDE!! (ORIGIN)



Despite these claims from the Brazilian Blowout website professing how safe it is as well as it improving the condition of  hair, the FDA has had complaints from state and local organizations that originated from Hair Salons.  The complaints were primarily:


Eye irritation
Breathing problems
Headaches


Formaldehyde is a colorless, flammable, strong-smelling chemical that is used in building materials and to produce many household products.  In addition, formaldehyde is commonly used as an industrial fungicide, germicide, and disinfectant, and as a preservative in mortuaries and medical laboratories. Formaldehyde also occurs naturally in the environment. It is produced in small amounts by most living organisms as part of normal metabolic processes.  (ORIGIN)




 There have been tests taken from Canadian Health officials as well as OSHA.  Both found traces of Formaldehyde.  Brazilian Blowout has fought back standing behind their claims of no Formaldehyde in their product. Nonetheless, it appears neither side is backing down on their findings and/or claims


What does this mean for the women interested in this product?  I say stay the hell away from it.  Some may say I'm biased since I'm a Natural and don't even like relaxers but this sounds dangerous and I truly find the claims of it actually helping the hair far fetched!  This procedure just may be too NEW.  It may take years before the harmful results can be undeniably proven.  Meanwhile more women could be harmed by this procedure and not just the clients but the salon workers as well.  Sad and scary.

LITK: The MixedChicks PR Debacle

Man, talk about making a STUPID move!  I've used Mixed Chicks in the past and wasn't impressed with the products.  Too watery and didn't do anything good for my hair.  The name alone kind of put me off because it IMPLIES it's only for Mixed women but I looked past that and give them a chance.  This makes me realize what they REALLY think about black women as a whole.  Will NOT be promoting this line! 

(ORIGIN)

LITK: The MixedChicks PR Debacle: "Yeah, son. That tweet was not a good idea. I first saw it on Tumblr, where brokeymcpoverty left the hilarious com..."

Freedom from chemical bondage....

(ORIGIN)

I am seeing two different types of Naturals:

1.   Completely Natural without the use of chemicals altering the natural texture of the hair.
2.   Semi-Natural without the use of  chemical altering of the texture BUT will straighten with flat-iron. May or may not use chemical dye to color hair.

I guess I fall into the first category.  I feel l should take my hair as it grows out of my head.  I've been blanketed with a false belief that I had to change what was me into something that WASN'T me for the masses.  How sad and odd when you really think about it. 

I understand women of all races color hair but that is chemically altering the hair and I'm a little skittish about that now.  I don't even wanna flat iron and I know millions of black women do it and still consider themselves Natural all because it isn't permanent like relaxing or texturizing the hair.  I think burning the hair into a straight texture is just as bad as relaxing and all Naturals who fall into the first category would probably agree with me.

In all fairness I've never been one to color my hair.  I can actually count on one hand how many times I've done it.  I'm 40 so I'm way behind most women.  I'm getting some gray hairs and although I'm not extremely vain, I would like to color and try Henna.  I don't think I would do it myself and would go to a salon that specializes in the use of Henna.  I'll be checking around the Denver area for one.

See, this is why I love this tee shirt above.  It clearly expresses how I feel about my hair and about myself.  I am beautiful just as I am.  I don't need to alter my hair, or any other Afrocentric features I possess to appease the masses.  I am also financially free from the restraints of chemicals since relaxers are EXPENSIVE.  I spend much less money on my hair as well as my daughter's hair because braids, relaxers and flat ironing requires a stylist for us.  I don't do those things myself so I would have to pay for others to do this for us.  Handling my own hair requires no money for a stylist and no money for the pricey products they must use to do my hair.  Now, I spend money to purchase the products I do use but it's much less and I have more control over what I choose to use. 

Wherever Naturals fall in the world of Natural hair there is room for us all.  I don't wanna see a war of the Naturals on who is more true to the 'cause', but divisions come regardless of the good intentions of the persons involved.   As long as there is acceptance of ourselves we can understand and appreciate this very simple statement being put on a tee shirt for the world to see what we are:  NATURAL...

Trying to stay positive

(ORIGIN)

Some days it's really hard to keep the floodgates to the tears at bay.  Some days negative thoughts, worries, hurtful remarks, or just plain old doubts can creep into one's mind and take your positive demeanor hostage.  

On days like this (as I am having right now) I try to see the imaginary glass half full as I look at all the good things in my life. 

It's not always easy keeping my usual bubbly nature present when family obligations, bills, or work gets overwhelming.  I know life isn't always easy nor is it simple, but logic doesn't come strong enough to wipe away the tears as they stream down your face or loosen the invisible arms that wrap you up and squeeze all the energy out of you. 

Sometimes you just gotta cry. I guess there's nothing wrong with that.  Release the negative oppressor through those tired tear ducts and allow some peace to enter through the pores and regain one's center.   Sounds good enough.  Even sounds easy enough.  Just not always attainable and I don't have it on the list of 'THINGS TO DO TODAY'.  Right now I'm just gonna ride this wave until I'm spent and make the best of a bad day.  We're all entitled, right?

Zinc, Selenium, Iodine and Calcium - A variety of minerals are needed to grow hair

Rather interesting.

Zinc, Selenium, Iodine and Calcium - A variety of minerals are needed to grow hair

Would you go to a Stylist who wasn't BLACK?

Salon Avicenna



I've seen this question on many blogs, forums and articles.  As a former relaxed Black woman I only went to Black stylists.  I've never considered going to anyone who wasn't Black and when I first went Natural I still felt that way.  I've since changed my way of thinking.

My daughter (above) is getting her hair flat ironed and trimmed at a salon owned and ran by Hispanic women.  Nicole, (the stylist) is one of my friends I met when we moved here to Denver, Colorado.  There isn't a huge Black population here in Denver but there are quite a few Black owned salons.  We've actually gone to a few and my sister (before going Natural the summer of 2010) used to go to a Black stylist weekly. 

I've learned something extremely valuable within the past two years.  You don't have to have a Black woman as your stylist. 

Now, don't get me wrong.  I wouldn't go to just ANYBODY, and I'm not real sure I would go to a white stylist at all, but Hispanic women who deal with and specialize in curly hair....yea, I've on board with that!  The owner (Nicole's mother) knew exactly how to deal with our hair.  Back when we first moved here I brought Megan to her and she told me how her hair would grow (out and then down by weight) what products to use and how to take care of it.  I didn't have a clue what to do with her hair,  and I was still wearing wigs, weaves and braids so I wasn't even doing my hair.  I didn't heed her words and started taking Megan to a Black stylist whenever she wanted a flat iron.  I thought, what did that Hispanic woman know about Black hair?

Salon Avicenna

Well, I learned A LOT since then and soon realized that Hispanic woman knew a lot more than I gave her credit.  My sister's stylist  was burning the hell out of Megan's hair and you could literally smell the burning.  She had it bone straight.  I had her flat iron mine once (after I was properly taking care of my hair) for a trim and I couldn't wait to get home and wash my hair and get rid of that burnt smell.  It took three washing before that burnt smell went away!  NOT KIDDING.  Three washings.  I was mortified.  I could smell the burnt smell on my pillow, my satin bonnet as well as my own hair.  My husband could smell it too.  How could that be any better than relaxing?  I stopped going to her.     

We went back to Nicole and Megan's hair isn't BONE STRAIGHT but why does it need to be?  It was straight, beautiful, blowing in the wind and NOT BURNT.  She blowdryed it with a brush, applied some natural oil (will get the name later) and flat ironed it.  It was gorgeous.  Megan loves it because it has volume unlike when we went to the Black stylist.  We've found our home when we wanna go to a salon.

I have nothing against Black stylist and I know there are some out there who can work with Natural hair.  I'm just saying I've found a Hispanic woman who knows what she's doing and I'm not gonna pass her up JUST to find a Black one.  I've learned a valuable lesson and I just wanted to pass it on.  Don't judge a book by it's cover.  You could get burned...

10 Most (and 10 Least) Tolerant States in America

Martin Luther King Jr. once wisely said, "Like an unchecked cancer, hate corrodes the personality and eats away its vital unity. Hate destroys a man's sense of values and his objectivity." So, how far have we come since King's time in conquering the hate in our society? The Daily Beast put some metrics together to understand which states are the most and least tolerant in the U.S.

Here's how they did it:

For each state we considered the number of hate crimes according to the FBI, the extent of hate-crime statutes, the number of complaints of discrimination filed through the Office of Fair Housing and Equal Opportunity, the extent of fair-housing and fair-workplace laws, the percentage of residents that support same-sex marriage, the extent of legal rights for same-sex couples, and the percentage of residents that are accepting of various religions. Each state was given a score out of 100 points. Ties were broken based on hate-crime statistics--if the total points matched, the state with fewer hate crimes in the last year ranked higher.

And now for the breakdown ... Wisconsin wins for being the most tolerant. It's religious tolerance was quite good, it's gay tolerance leaves room for improvement. Others in the top 10 were Maryland in second, then Illinois, Pennsylvania, Hawaii, California, Minnesota, New Jersey, New Hampshire and New Mexico.

And on the flip-side, the 10 least tolerant states are Alabama, finishing 40th in the nation, then it gets worse going to Kentucky, North Dakota, Arizona, Utah, Idaho, Ohio, Nebraska, Kansas, Arkansas and then Wyoming finishes dead last. 

Please click on the link: alternet.org for the remaining portion of the article.

CO-Washing: Natural Hair 101

(ORIGIN)

Technique Tuesdays - A look into some old and new techniques used on Natural Hair

Co-washing is a staple technique for Naturals.  It's one of the first things I learned about on my quest for maintaing healthy, happy Natural hair.  It's essential and (I think) the number one reason lots of Black women won't go Natural. 

Water...it's essential for life and extremely essential for healthy Natural hair.  It's the cheapest and easiest moisturizer and Natural Hair loves it.  Combine water with conditioner and you've got the perfect marriage for moisturizing our hair.  Relaxed women primarily don't or won't want to wet their hair and co-washing must be done with water.

Co-washing your hair is the same as washing with Shampoo but replaced with conditioner.  Shampoo is deeply cleansing the hair and can harm and strip the hair of essential oils.  Shampooing too often is actually not good for our hair.  Co-washing can cut down on how often a Natural needs to shampoo and since it mildly cleanses the hair, some Naturals have stopped using shampoo altogether. 

I still shampoo but only once a week or once every two weeks.  I don't repeat as most shampoo instructions specify but I did when I was relaxed.  I find I'm not using harmful products on my hair so one application of  shampoo wash is sufficient.  Everyone has their own technique but here's the just of it:

I jump in the shower and allow the water to penetrate my hair thoroughly.  I apply my staple conditioner Kinky Curly Knot today to my palm.  Amount?  About the size of a gumball.  On some days I'll add the size of a golf ball but you really can't go wrong with being generous and as long as it has slip, I'm good.  I finger comb the conditioner through and sometimes use my wide tooth comb but finger combing is the usual method. 

Slip- Used to describe how slippery a product is (usually a conditioner or detangler)... the more slip it has, the more effectively it will coat the hair to aid in detangling. CurlyNikki

I allow the conditioner to sit while I finish my shower and then rinse some of the conditioner out.  I do keep some in since Knot Today works well left in.   That's it!  Co-washing.  Your hair will thank you in the end.  I co-wash about four or five times a week and have been doing that for over two years.  I used to have a dandruff problem while relaxed and even when I flat iron it comes back but while I co-wash and do my daily wash and go, I have been dandruff free! 

Co-washing is one of the most essential Natural hair requirements for moisturized, healthy, happy hair.  You'll be satisfied with the results.

Pictures to admire...

A year ago today...



My son Taylen

 One year ago today, my son was diagnosed with Type I Diabetes.  We were shocked, devastated, and scared all at the same time.  It was a life altering experience and we weren't ready for it. 

Not like anyone ever is but sometimes you have a clue.  Now, Type 2 runs heavily in my family as well as my husbands but we still can't trace Type I on either side.  Some evidence has shown it could have been just a virus but we really don't know. 

Well, that first year was crazy.  Not only did we have to change how we lived but we were taking a trip to New Orleans for Mardi Gras and the Superbowl.  We were taking a road trip within a month of finding out our son had Diabetes.  Not the best time for a vacation.  We were thrown into a new world but we had the best help a parent could have.  Denver is the home to the Barbara Davis Center for Childhood Diabetes and I cannot explain how wonderful that place is!  They swooped us up, put us in classes for Type 1, gave us supplies and most of all...they ensured us we could handle this.  We had the best foundation a parent could have dealing with a child's illness.  That trip was successful and it was exactly what we needed.  It proved we could handle this and continue to live normally.

Taylen has been an angel.  He's been so brave and understanding and when he does act like a little brat over this whole thing I cannot be upset with him in the least.  How would I act suddenly knowing I would be insulin dependent for the rest of my life?  How would I feel knowing I will have to prick my fingers over six times a day and taking four shots a day of insulin?  I cannot even IMAGINE.

His acceptance and strength has made this past year smoother than I would have ever imagined.  I love my son and I cannot tell you what it feels like to be going through this.  Words cannot express what we went and continue to go through, but with one year down I know we will survive.  My son is doing great and he's alive and can and WILL live to be a very old man.  Through research and dedication maybe one day he will no longer be insulin dependent.  Until then we will continue to do what is necessary for this little boy to enjoy life. 

Seriously Sundays

This is one of those special Sundays.  It's part of a three day weekend.  I just LOVE those.  Well, as everyone already knows it's MLK weekend and the kids and I have it off. 

I woke up late but I seem to get my sleep during the weekends.  I only get roughly five hours of sleep a night during the week and I crash on Saturday and Sunday.  This extra day will be appreciated (as always) as it's allowed me to enjoy all of my most favorite movies on TV today! 

I am in Sci Fi heaven with a buffet full of my favorite Sci Fi movies:
Predator
Hellboy I and Hellboy II
The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen
Underworld

My sister says I'm not a TRUE sci fi fan because she is and her love for it is on a whole nother level but I've got my favorites and the majority are mentioned above.  I've been flipping channels since they are all  on at the same time and I really need to be cooking.  Despite that I'm blogging and eating pizza and watching my movies and in heaven.

I've been featured!!

I've been featured!  check it out.

http://aunaturaleandlovingit.blogspot.com/2011/01/meet-sabrina-r-perkins.html

NPR Radio Show Features Curl Advocacy

Good news!!

NPR Radio Show Features Curl Advocacy

Vacation Fridays!!!!

I love Fridays and I love beaches.....put that together and you get me wishing I was on SOMEBODY'S lovely beach draped in something sheer with my natural hair whipping in the breeze off the ocean.  Yea, that's where I wanna be right now.

Well, here's one of my walls at work and I make sure it's of places more serene and beautiful than where my body is at the present time.  These pictures of beaches (mostly in Cabo San Lucas, my absolute favorite place in the world) allows me to drift off from time to time to make the day pass by a little faster.  It's a place where my mind and soul can connect and regenerate my positive energy.  Work can drain the hell out of you if you don't remove yourself from it sometimes.  Don't you agree?

OK Naturals, I've shown my 'place I'd rather be'......where would you rather be??

Essence Magazine Project

So, I got my first month of Essence Magazine in the mail yesterday.  I used to subscribe when we lived in New Orleans and was a faithful subscriber for years.  It was my favorite magazine for make-up, fashion as well as hair.  I tried to continue but I got kind of bored with it.  I mean I could find all that and more on the web so why did I continue to bother with a subscription?  I cancelled and never looked back.

I was on Essence.com for whatever reason recently and fell in love with the memory of the magazine.  I don't have any other subsciptions for myself besides Consumer Reports (our shopping bible) so I took the plunge again.                                                          

I flipped through it rather quickly and couldn't help but notice a trend.  90% of the women whether in articles or advertisements were Relaxed.  Now, a few years ago that wouldn't have even mattered and I wouldn't have even thought about it but as much time, energy and interest I have in Natural hair now....it was disturbing to me.

I was on one of the many Natural hair websites a few weeks ago and many of the women were dogging out Essence Magazine claiming it was a poor representation of black women.  They were saying it wasn't diverse enough.  It all boiled down to the fact that Naturals weren't being rightfully represented in the magazine. 

I can say that I see more Naturals on television commercials than I did in this issue but to be fair I will read every month cover to cover and do sort of an research project seeing if Essence Magazine is keeping up with the times.  Naturals are becoming more and more prevalent and even though I don't think relaxing will ever go away, I do believe enough Naturals are currently around and switching at such significant rates that Essence should be reflecting that in it's publication. 

My intention is to not tear down a magazine geared towards black women nor discredit it because last summer Essence was criticized for hiring it's first white Fashion Designer.  That's not my fight or interest.  My interest is to see more  of the black women I see as well as talk to in forums and blogs in that and other magazines.

If Naturals are to find publications that show a fair representation of themselves then we have to make them accountable.  The web is great but I want to see those fashion and hair magazines with 'us' in them too.  I get tired of seeing one here and there in the magazines supposedly for all like ELLE and Vogue.  I think magazines for Black women should be and stay at the pulse of what's hot, important, and accurate. 

Feel free to chime in and give your take on it Naturals. 

Too old to be Natural?



(ORIGIN)


OK, I turned 40 last year and it's only been five years I've been relaxer free but only two years I've been completely Natural and nurtured my curls.  Now, I was little in the 70's and by the time I was a teen relaxers were  BIG BUSINESS and living in humid ass Mississippi meant you had a perm if your mother loved you at all!  I've never really known my Natural hair and this Natural hair journey has been wonderful and enlightening. 

Now, it seems that the majority of the Newly Natural are YOUNGER than me.  I have no numbers or stats but I'd guess the majority are younger than 30.  It might even be younger than 25 but like I said....not real data, but I'm pretty sure that the majority of the Naturals are way younger than my ass.  They are stylish, skinny, confident and lovely.  I am stylish (for 40),  NOT SKINNY, gaining confidence daily and feeling kinda lovely on most days. 

I don't wanna see this Natural explosion as fashion driven but even if it is, I'm here to stay.  When I get on Natural hair websites I feel like I'm babysitting!  I'm on forums with college students who have no kids and think spending $30 on a jar of hair gel is a crime against nature!  Where the hell are the older Naturals?  I understand I'm coming into this game in the 7th inning but DAMN!

I honestly don't feel I'm too old to be Natural but I do feel a little left out in some blogs and styles.  Nonetheless, I'm here and I'll continue to look at the pics on the blogs of the younguns as they shake their skinny asses in too tight/short/sheer clothes in the clubs they live in till the wee hours of the morning.  I ain't clubbin no more and I'm yawning by 11:00 pm as well as getting brats to bed after homework, bath and dinner.  I'm a Natural....just a mature one and happy to be in the company of the young ones....

Just wanna see more of us sometimes.